ur mom hands u a glass of orange juice. u take a sip. its not orange juice. its stirred egg yolks. u spit them all out. u ask ur mom why. she turns around. its not ur mom. its me. ur mom is gone. im ur mother now
these old spice commercials have been getting really crazy lately
remember way back in 2006 when the wii first came out and then the entirety of the world forgot how to hold onto something with a firm grasp so much that nintendo had to make a shock absorbing condom just so that tvs wouldnt get destroyed when people would end up sending this thing flying at their tvs at 900 miles per hour
DEAR PEOPLE WHO MADE “THE GIVER” MOVIE:
THERE ARE NO FUCKING HOVERCRAFTS IN THE BOOK
NO HOVERCRAFTS ABDUCT JONAS IN THE BOOK
JONAS AND FIONA DO NOT FALL IN LOVE IN THE BOOK
THE INJECTIONS ARE PILLS IN THE BOOK
PLEASEJONAS IS TWELVE IN THE BOOK.
I DONT KNOW WHAT THIS IS BUT HOW DO YOU FUCK UP THAT BADLY
*Percy Jackson fans laughing in the distance*
The child wakes up, expecting to see a familiar face of terror before him, but what he sees is a white emptiness, gently carrying him away from the burning house.
It wasn’t the face of a monster, unlike the one in his home; who leave its painful marks on his fragile body, who hurt his mom until she died of grief, and unable to help him… no it was pale white, eyeless but he find it comforting.
“Just like those dummies in the mall where mom used to take me to…” he thought.
He held tightly on his ghostly savior, and close his eyes to sleep in his arms, as he was taken far away from his burning home, from the monster, and into the forest.
Tumblr, turning a terrifying urban legend into a misunderstood saviour.
OH I LIKE THIS MUCH BETTER
so let me get this straight
if Slender Man is a good guy who goes after child abusers and child molesters
IN SLENDER YOU ARE THE MONSTER
HE IS THE HERO AND YOU ARE THE DEMON HE’S HUNTING DOWN TO SAVE A CHILD
A CHILD WHO PROBABLY FEARS HIM AND DREW THOSE NOTES THAT BLEW AWAY IN THE WIND AND GOT STUCK ON TREES AND YOU HUNT HIM DOWN LIKE THE SCUM YOU ARE AND SLENDY SAVES THE DAY
IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW
THAT’S WHY YOU CAN’T WIN
AND WHY THE NOTES SAY THOSE THINGS
LIKE TO GO AWAY
YES THIS IS GOOD
he is so shocked
what i did in graphic design class today is
this has 70,200 notes and you’re all fucking dead to me
Tumblr needs more of this….whatever this is.
Is this the same artist who made the original for this
how women actually are
OH MY GOD IF I DON’T EVER REBLOG THIS IT’S PROBABLY BECAUSE I’M DEAD
mother fuckin macys sale
My moms name is Doris